As a mom, my life can quickly become stressful and overwhelming. If I don’t stay a step ahead, I begin to fall behind before I know it. I’m juggling my priorities while trying to stay on top of my home management. It’s not as easy as it may seem.
As a stay at home mom, I’m not punching a clock so to speak. I don’t have someone else setting my schedule or giving me guidelines. No one is there to cheer me on as I work my way through my to-do list. Adult interaction is nearly non-existent.
Don’t get me wrong. It’s a beautiful life and one I wouldn’t change for the world. However, I can quickly become overwhelmed by all that I should be doing. Often times the anxiety of it all gets to me and I start to spin in circles wondering what I should do to get on top of things. I eventually give up thinking I will never catch back up.
Can you relate?
There is a way to ease the stress, overcome the anxiety, and simplify life. If you follow these 15 steps, I think you will find your days run more smoothly and you will become a much less overwhelmed mom!
1. Spend time with God
As a Christian, I try to find time in my day to spend with God both reading the Bible and in prayer. It’s something that rejuvenates me and calms my mind. It brings a sense of peace to my day.
I realize that not everyone is a Christian or finds there value in Christ. This is something that I {try} to fit into each day. If you are a Christian, then you know that spending time with God can simplify your life by giving you the wisdom and knowledge to go through your day as an example of Christ and His love.
Also, please note, that this is something I greatly struggle with. I’m not perfect, nor do I want to give off that perception. This is one of my goals this year for a good reason. I’ve failed in the past and need to find improvement.
2. Prepare the night before
A great day starts the night before! I suggest doing as much as you possibly can at night to prepare for the following day.
One thing I always do is make a to do list for the next day. Sometimes it only has 2 or 3 items on it, but it gets the clutter out of my brain and onto paper so I can get a good night’s sleep. This also gives me an idea of how my day is going to go.
Something else I always try to do get done is night is prepare my coffee for the next day. I like to have my coffee ready to push start the next morning. I don’t know about you, but when I wake up to two little minions asking for food, trying to get dressed, and out the door for the day, I don’t want to have to think about my coffee. It just needs to be there. In large quantities. 🙂
I will also occasionally prepare breakfast the night before. I don’t always get this done, but, WOW, does it make a huge difference in my morning! If I’m making granola bars or baked oatmeal for breakfast, I will usually just throw it together the night before so that I can serve it quickly the next morning.
Maybe you need to prepare/pack lunches for your kids or husband the next day. Maybe picking out your clothes would help to save you time in the morning. Whatever it may be, try to do as much as you can the night before. It’s much less stressful to get things done when you aren’t trying to beat the clock.
3. Get plenty of sleep
I speak from experience when I say that you will be more productive and less stressed when you get enough sleep. I know it’s tempting to try to use those late night hours when the kids are asleep to get a lot accomplished whether that be house work, a work from home job, or maybe just some quality time with your spouse. But it’s so important to make sleep a priority, especially if you are waking up in the middle of the night with babies or young children.
You need to figure out how much sleep your body needs. There have been tons of studies done and books written on the importance of sleep. I have found over the years that my body functions best on 7.5 – 8 hours of sleep.
I recommend using the Sleep Cycle App on your phone to ensure that you get enough sleep and wake up feeling rested. It’s a great tool that will wake you up during the lightest phase of sleep. You set a
4. Get up 15 minutes earlier
Yes, this may slightly contradict my previous point. But hear me out! Fifteen minutes can make such a huge difference in how your morning runs. I challenge you to try it! Decide what time you need to get up to get everything done before you have to walk out the door or get going on your daily tasks. Then back that time up by 15 minutes.
I’ve found that just an extra 15 minutes makes me more relaxed. I’m able to spend a little extra time just enjoying my babies, having a conversation with my 4 year old about preschool, and sometimes squeezing in a quick book with both my boys. While I would love to get up before my kids, it’s just not something I’m able to do right now. {Does anyone else have kids who wake as soon as your bedroom door opens?! What is that?} However, I can have a calmer morning that I can spend enjoying my kids rather than stressing and {gasp!} yelling to get everyone out the door on time. Fifteen minutes doesn’t seem like a lot, but it can really make such a difference.
5. Create a morning routine
Routines can help you to create focus and increase your productivity. Having a morning routine will help to simplify your life by creating structure. I have found that when I don’t follow my morning routine, I feel like I go about my day aimlessly trying to play catch up.
A morning routine doesn’t have to be complicated or take hours and hours of your time. Keep it simple. It’s really amazing how much you can get done in 15-20 minutes. You will be astounded by hour accomplished you feel when your finished. Plus, you will be just that much farther ahead of your home management for the day.
Related: Creating a Morning Routine {for Busy Moms}
6. Declutter your home
Decluttering an entire home is a process and much more than I can squeeze into a small section of one post. However, the benefits of a decluttered home will surely simplify your life as a stay at home mom.
Consider how much time you spend in your home if you stay home with your kids. If you are constantly stressed by the clutter and chaos you are surrounded by, you will become overwhelmed, frustrated, and anxious. You temperament and attitude will begin to reflect your surroundings.
However, if you surround yourself with a peaceful and calm space that is filled with only things that bring you joy and are useful, you will become a reflection of tranquility of it all. It’s really simple. Uncluttered home = uncluttered mind = happy mom! 🙂
Obviously as a mom, you will have toys on the floor, dirty dishes to deal with at some point, and piles of laundry. But if at the end of the day everything has a home and is tidied, you will still reap the benefits of an uncluttered home.
7. Organize, especially the high traffic areas
There is a different between organizing and decluttering. You can declutter a closet or cabinet, keeping only the things you use and love, and still have an unorganized mess. This makes it hard to find things you need, wastes valuable time and possibly money when you end up replacing said items, and does not simplify your life in the least.
Create order out of the chaos by setting up simple systems that make your life easier. It doesn’t have to be complicated.
Start small by making a designated spot for your keys and a place to put your purse or diaper bag. If your entire house needs an overhaul, begin by spending 15-20 minutes a day organizing a space. Clean out a drawer in your kitchen, tidy your linen closet, or straighten and organize some drawers in your kids bedroom. One small project a day can lead to a much more organized home.
When there is a place for everything, you won’t spend extra time hunting and searching for things and you won’t be buried under a mess. An organized home creates a peaceful environment.
8. Use your timer
I love my timer! It’s so useful for so many things. I use it almost every day, usually multiple times each day. I don’t know about you, but I quickly get busy and lose track of time if I don’t have a reminder.
As a mom, a timer can really come in handy and help to make your life just a little bit simpler. Consider all the things you need to keep track of the time for:
- Baking cookies in the oven
- Cooking rice on the stove
- Toddler timeouts for poor behavior
- Quick 5-10 minute house pick-ups
- Timing between bathroom breaks when potty training
- Keeping track of technology time for kids
This list is just the tip of the iceberg for me. If I try to “keep track” of time on my own, inevitably my cookies burn, my toddler has an accident, or my kids spend too much time watching television. With modern technology, timers are so easy to access on our phones. They are a quick resource that simplifies our homes and our lives as busy moms.
9. Stop sorting laundry
I’m not a laundry sorter. I have exactly two baskets and I really don’t see myself wavering from this anytime soon. One basket is for hot water (towels and sheets) and the other basket is cold water (all clothing). Could I separate into darks, lights, colors, whites, jeans, delicates, and so on? Sure. But I really don’t see the point when my clothing comes out just as clean this way.
We don’t buy clothing that requires a lot of extra “maintenance.” You won’t find anything in my closet that says dry clean only. Honestly, I don’t have the time, nor do I want to spend the extra money, to go to the dry cleaners to clean one article of clothing.
Most of our clothing consists of cotton knit fabric that is easily washable. I spot treat all stains with Grandma’s Spot Treatment Remover that I purchased from Hobby Lobby several years ago (still on my first bottle and it’s at least 2 years old) and it seriously gets out everything! Sharpie, blood, grass stains, everything. All clothing goes in cold water and comes out looking great!
Two baskets. Two loads of laundry. So easy and simple. Maybe this method isn’t for you. But I promise, if you can make it work, it will simplify your laundry routine!
Related: A Simple System That Will Keep Your Home Clean
10. Automate your bills
If you are sitting down multiple times each month to pay your bills, you can really simplify the process by putting everything on automation.
When I was growing up, my mom would sit down with a stack of bills and her checkbook on payday and spend at least an hour working and reworking the budget, writing checks, stuffing envelopes, and balancing the checkbook just to pay her bills. Just thinking back on the process I watched unfold makes me exhausted! And stressed. Really stressed.
I don’t know about you, but I really hate deadlines. I hate the looming feeling of knowing I have to remember to do something by a certain date or else there will be a consequence (in this case a late fee). This is why I’ve chosen to automate all of my bills.
My bills are on autopilot so if something were to happen like an extended hospital stay or a week long vacation, my power isn’t going to get shut off because I didn’t get my bill mailed out on time. Automating my bills is like taking one thing off my mental to-do list. As long as we’ve gone over our budget for the month, we are good to go!
11. Use cash
While you may think that using cash would make budgeting more complicated, it’s quite the opposite. When you live on a cash budget, you know exactly how much you have to spend in each category and you will never go over. There is no worrying about if the money is in your account or if you will be able to pay off the high balance you racked up on your credit card.
It may seem like you will have to do extra work when using cash. This is true to an extent. You will actually have to budget. You will have to make a trip to the bank once or twice a month to take out all the cash you need. You will have to tell yourself NO from time to time when the money runs out. However, all of these things are so minor when compared to the peace of mind you will have from knowing that the money is there to buy groceries or gas for your car.
Related: 4 Reasons Why Using the Cash Envelope System will Simplify Your Life
12. Make a meal plan
It’s 5 o’clock, the kids are going bonkers, your husband is on his way home from work, and you have absolutely no idea what to fix for dinner. Have you been there? I have and it’s not fun. In fact, it pretty much the number one things that sends my stress levels through the roof!
However, creating a meal plan can save you from the overwhelm. It gives you structure and an answer to the, “Whats for dinner? question. It takes the guess work out of your job and tells you what to do.
Meal planning also allows you to plan ahead by pulling out food from the freezer the night before or sticking dinner in the crock pot that morning.
Meal planning doesn’t have to be complicated. If you’ve never meal planned before, start small. Pick 5-7 dinners (however many you need for a weeks worth of meals) and write them down. Then create a grocery list with the ingredients for those meals. Simple as pie.
Related: How to Save Money By Meal Planning
13. Prep dinner during “downtime”
Do your kids begin to completely lose it right around 4pm everyday? Please tell me I’m not the only one! It’s like they know that mom is about to prepare dinner. If you are meal planning, you can begin to take advantage of your downtime by prepping dinner in advance. This will really begin to simplify your evenings.
Taking advantage of the morning preschool, afternoon naps, or early bedtimes can really help you simplify your days. Maybe you can prepare the entire meal during that time, stick it in the fridge and then pop it in the oven at 5pm. Maybe you just need to chop of the meat and vegetables so that you can throw together a quick stir fry later on. Whatever it may be, you can help yourself by using the little snippets of time you have throughout the day by getting one step ahead on dinner.
14. Carve out some “Me” time
I would like to be optimistic, however, realistically I know that I just can’t do this every single day. I’m not going to expect you to either. However, maybe you can carve out 5-10 minutes of quiet/alone time each day. This could be time doing something you love. Maybe this is time you spend reading your Bible and praying. This might be something you do in your evening routine like taking a hot bath. Maybe you enjoy sewing or crafting so you carve out 20-30 minutes during nap time a few time a week to do what you love. If you enjoy baking, maybe you make time to mix up a few batches of cookies throughout the week.
Finding time to spend doing the things you love and the things that fill you up will help to rejuvenate and inspire you. These will be the things that remind you that you are not just a wife, mom, or homemaker, but you are a woman!
I challenge you to carve out some time as often as you can. Ask your husband for help if you need to. Find a way to spend time doing what you love outside of the day to day.
15. Never go to bed without finishing your evening routine
An evening routine doesn’t have to be super detailed or take you a long time. I can usually finish mine in 15-30 minutes, depending on how dirty my kitchen is when I start. However, it means that I won’t start my next day off behind. It means that I can go to bed without worrying about the dirty dishes in the sink or the load of laundry that never got switched over to the dryer. It means I can relax.
I’ve had times of my life where I’ve tried to do to much right before bed. By the time I get finished with the dinner madness and bedtime rush, I’m exhausted and just want to have a little bit of quiet time. If all you can dedicated to you evening routine is 10 minutes, then by all means do that. Set the timer and go as quickly as you can to get as much done in that 10 minutes. Even if you don’t get to everything, you will be that much more ahead the next day when you wake up!
Finishing your evening routine will give you the freedom to enjoy your night and quiet your mind.
Related: Creating an Evening Routine for Busy Moms
If you feel overwhelmed as a stay at home mom, I challenge you to try to implement just one of these tips above. Add them in slowly and be diligent. I think the old saying is, “Rome wasn’t built in a day.” Simplifying your life can’t be done overnight. It’s a process that will take time, but be so worth it in the end!
How have you simplified your life?
If you are stressed out, overwhelmed by everything you have going on, and just generally tired all of the time, then you may need to rethink your strategies and makeover your mornings! Crystal Paine from Money Saving Mom has a wonderful online course that is thorough, yet to the point that will help you transform your mornings and change your life. Just click on the link below to get your first day in the 14 day course for free! Psst…Crystal also has a new Make Over Your Evenings course that you can find here!
Amy says
I’ve done a lot to simplify my life over the past 12 years. I moved closer to where I was attending graduate school, got rid of a lot of clothes, got rid of 60 pairs of shoes, got rid of over 1500 books and simplified our meals. We have the same dinner each night of the week and have for the 11 years now, unless we go out to eat and then it’s whatever you want. I started adjuncting instead of teaching full time 8 years ago when we decided to homeschool our oldest and then retired from teaching at the university altogether a little over 2 years ago when our youngest was 3.
I just do everything in one load for laundry. The CDC guidelines says that items need to be washed at 160°F for 25 minutes to remove germs with detergent alone. Since our hot water isn’t that hot we just wash everything together in cold. If someone is sick we’ll make sure to stick it outside to dry on a portable laundry line so the UV rays can kill the germs for us.
The Jessie K says
Such good tips!! I completely agree with all of them, and even though some days are harder than others, I TRY to keep these as ‘habits’ to keep me going.
Ps- we have the same laundry style. I look at it as working smarter, not harder!! 😉
Kaitlin says
Thanks, Jessie! I feel like I have the “work smarter, not harder” mentality for all of my household cleaning these days! 🙂
Amelia says
As a military wife and stay at home mother of 2 beautiful children (Mikey 3 & Emely 3mo) I’m always overwhelmed by the amount of laundry and dishes that seem to never end. On top of that I’m in the process of toilet training and diaper changes. at the end of the day I feel like I’ve accomplished absolutely nothing. I just don’t seem to have any time to begin to get organized without losing my mind in the process. And meal planning is always an issue of disagreement between me and my husband. He plans one way and I plan in a totally different way which makes grocery shopping a major headache. HELP!
Kaitlin says
Oh, Amelia! My heart goes out to you. I’ve re-read your comment several times and each time I can see how overwhelmed you feel even more. I know it seems tough, but remember baby steps! Here are a few tips that I’ve gathered that may help you feel like you can get a little more control back in your day.
1. Try to follow through with a morning and evening routine to stay on top of the day to day stuff. This really helps me when I follow through. It makes such a big difference when I wake up already ahead of my game.
2. Try to carve out 15 minutes a day to do something in your home/life that will help you feel more organized. Utilize your kids’ nap times, do it after they go to bed, or give them some room time or tv time for a short time. You can do a ton in 15 minutes. Just think, in a week’s times, you will have spent 105 minutes organizing! Chip away at it.
3. As far as meal planning/grocery shopping is concerned, have you tried talking to your husband about it? Is there some type of compromise you can come to? I realize it’s hard for me to help since I don’t know both of your thoughts and strategies on the matter. If one of you is a planner and one of you is more of a free-spirit, maybe you could plan out 4 meals each week, then have 3 meals that you come up with on the fly at the grocery store.
As far as potty training/diaper changing goes and not feeling like you get anything accomplished, it’s life as mom. 🙂 Give yourself grace. It’s a season and is so, so short. It will be over before you know it. Oh, and your little one is 3 months old! Oh my, I just re-read that! Oh yes, those first 6 months are a complete blur! It will be okay! I promise! There are days that I’m doing good to get my teeth brushed and keep my kids fed, but that’s okay. You are doing good, mama! 🙂
I really hope this helps! If you have anymore problems, questions, or just want to chat, please feel free to shoot me an email! I’d love to help in any way I can.